IELTS Academic Writing Task 2

IELTS writing tasks' topics, answers, and comments.

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By Prapti Sharma, 2019-01-16  
Band: NA (Total words: 323)
Comment:
  • The introduction isn't strong enough, suggest to enhance it.
  • Paragraph 1 is relatively short, enrich it.
  • Paragraph 2 seems long, suggest to split it.
  • You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has AND(11) CHILDREN(9) FOOD(7); try to decrease duplicated words.
  • High ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing, suggest to rephrase some of them. You can try to rewrite Conclusion as start point.
  • Suggest to use a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level. E.g., Introduction seems too plain, try to polish it.
 IELTS Academic Writing Task 2 - Topic, Answer, and Comment
In many countries people are concerned about the number of children who are overweight.

What do you think are the causes of this?

What solutions can you suggest?

Write at least 250 words.
Overweight is the burning health problem of 21st century. Various nations in the world are focused on the growing number of overweight children.
This essay will delineate the major causes for obesity in children and possible solutions to overcome this trending health issue.
There are number of causes for the increasing weight in the children in this current era. One of the major contributing factor is the dietary habits. Nowadays, the food habits has drastically changed compared to the past. Advancement in the field of science and technology, improvement in the genetic breeding in plants and animals has led in easy accessibility of the processed food. Previously, food rich in the dietary fibers used to be the staple diet in majority of the countries. Time has changed, parents are rather concerned to fill the stomach of their children with whatever food their child is fond of. In addition, this leads to the consumption of junk and unhealthy food with less nutritional value. Also, the children are occupied with gadgets and indoor games, which has a detrimental effect in their physical fitness and good health. All of these described factors contributes for the ongoing phenomenon of rise in weight and various disease related to heart, blood vessels and nutritional deficiencies.
The possible solution for this health related debate is the modification in the dietary habits of the children, incorporation of major fiber rich food, fruits, less sugary food can help to a larger extent. Children should be motivated for outdoor games, involved in the physical activity in a regular basis and inclined towards exercise and yoga from beginning can induce a positive mechanism to lead a healthy life.
In conclusion, the overweight appreciated in the children is a major health concern in developed as well as in developing countries. Modification of dietary habits, involvement in the physical activity and motivation for exercise from the tender age can widely eliminate this problem in children.