IELTS Academic Essay Answers

Test materials of writing task 2: The shortage in housing has severe social consequences in many cities. Only the government can solve the problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #2200319
TOPIC: The shortage in housing has severe social consequences in many cities. Only the government can solve the problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Answer 1
Noways, according to the larger population densities, the limited amount of housing has raised people's concern. Someone suggests that it is the only government that can resolve the problems. I completely agree with this statement.
The most important relates to housing can cause traffic congestions, as the increase ...
By Siiiiiiilvia , 2020-04-28  View full answer - Revised by tutor
Total words: 354
AI Comment:
  • The essay is too long, suggest to shrink it.
  • The introduction isn't strong enough, suggest to enhance it.
  • The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
  • You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has HOUSING(6) ARE(6) CAN(5); try to decrease duplicated words.
  • High ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing, suggest to rephrase some of them. You can try to rewrite Paragraph 2 as start point.
  • Obvious Grammar Errors: 4.
Tutor Comment:
Band 5
Language skills are ok, but your points may risk your score. E.g. you say "governments ... let people...", many raters think "government by people"; besides, "One baby" isn't a policy of Indian.