IELTS Academic Essay Answers

Test materials of writing task 2: Rich countries often give financial aid to poor countries, but it does not solve poverty. So rich countries should give other types of help to poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #2200801
TOPIC: Rich countries often give financial aid to poor countries, but it does not solve poverty. So rich countries should give other types of help to poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Answer 1
For decades, rich countries have given financial aid to poorer countries, and the results along the line show that it does not solve poverty. While this financial aid may help, it does not solve the problem.
Firstly, It is apparent that poor countries are not only financially poor but poor in character and knowledge ...
By Aisha, 2020-08-04  View full answer - Revised by tutor
Total words: 295
AI Comment:
  • You had better rewrite the essay to 4 or 5 paragraphs.
  • You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has AND(10) NOT(9) AID(8); try to decrease duplicated words.
  • High ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing, suggest to rephrase some of them. You can try to rewrite Paragraph 1 as start point.
  • Obvious Grammar Errors: 4.
Tutor Comment:
Band 5.5
Task Response:
-All parts of the prompt are addressed, and a position is presented that is directly relevant to the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion:
-Ideas are generlly arranged coherently, and there is a clear overall progression.
Lexical Resources:
-Some spelling errors are noted; the essay's vocabulary is too plain, besides, "poor countries" should be rephrased.
- Help Link
Answer 2
In the world of globalization, many economically sound nations offer financial packages to resolve the issue of poverty in poor countries. Some people believe that wealthy countries should support them in diverse ways, including financial help. These views will be delved with the supporting arguments in further essay ...
By vaimik, 2020-08-03  View full answer - Revised by tutor
Total words: 312
AI Comment:
  • You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has COUNTRIES(8) THAT(6) POVERTY(5); try to decrease duplicated words.
  • High ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing, suggest to rephrase some of them. You can try to rewrite Paragraph 2 as start point.
  • Obvious Grammar Errors: 5.
Tutor Comment:
Band 5.5
Task Response:
-The logic and reasoning look good, but some sentences seem wordy and not in the style that academic writing should be in.
Task Response:
-You need to put forward more reasons for why you agree with the statement.
Coherence and Cohesion:
-The organization is evident and cohesive devices are used, though rather mechanically.
- Help Link
Lexical Resources:
-The essay didn't use less common vocabulary with accuracy.
- Help Link
Grammar Range and Accuracy:
-There is a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, and although errors occur, they rarely reduce communication.
Answer 3
It is often argued that financial assistance, which is generally provided by the developed nations, is not sufficient to eradicate poverty in the developing countries. Therefore, these nations should give other forms of aid to the impoverished sections of the world. This essay agrees with the given information because ...
By KM, 2020-08-11  View full answer - Revised by tutor
Total words: 324
AI Comment:
  • You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has AND(7) THAT(6) NOT(6); try to decrease duplicated words.
  • High ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing, suggest to rephrase some of them. You can try to rewrite Paragraph 2 as start point.
  • Obvious Grammar Errors: 2.
Tutor Comment:
Band 5.5
Task Response:
-You need to put forward more reasons for why you agree with the statement, the second paragraph is wordy, but just one support point.
Coherence and Cohesion:
-There is a clear overall progression in the response, but somewhat mechanically, with occasional errors
- Help Link
Lexical Resources:
-The essay didn't use less common vocabulary with accuracy.
- Help Link
Grammar Range and Accuracy:
-Grammatical errors are frequent, such as "a first".
- Help Link1, Help Link2
Answer 4
It is often argued that developed nations should replace financial supports that they are giving to developing countries because it fails to solve the poverty issue there. Personally, I completely agree with this view.
In my opinion, I believe that financial aid creates more problems than the benefit that it brings ...
By Martin, 2020-08-23  View full answer - Revised by tutor
Total words: 265
AI Comment:
  • The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
  • High ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing, suggest to rephrase some of them. You can try to rewrite Paragraph 1 as start point.
  • Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level. E.g., Introduction seems too plain, try to polish it.
  • Obvious Grammar Errors: 5.
Tutor Comment:
Band 5.5
Task Response:
-All parts of the prompt are addressed, and a position is presented that is directly relevant to the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion:
-Ideas are generlly arranged coherently, and there is a clear overall progression.
Lexical Resources:
-The essay didn't use less common vocabulary with accuracy.
- Help Link
Grammar Range and Accuracy:
-There are attempts to produce complex structures, but some contain errors.
- Help Link