Some people think that employers should not be concerned about how employees dress at work, but the quality of work only. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers Let me try to write.
 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #7051
Question:
Some people think employers should not be concerned about how employees dress but only about the quality of work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Answer Hints:
Problem analysis essay. You need to choose a position before writing.

Support
  • The dress code will not affect work performance.
  • A casual dress code helps to release work pressure.
  • Employees are more creative.
  • Employees pay more attention to completing tasks.
  • Employers pay less effort to manage.
Oppose
  • A strict dress code builds the spirit and sense of responsibility.
  • It has a positive impact on the work performance of an organization.
  • In some industries, a dress code helps to create safe and comfortable working conditions.
  • A dress code plays a role to run tasks smoothly in some collective and complicated circumstances.
Answer 1
Undeniably, people consider the quality of work the essential factor in judging employees rather than what they dress in a modern workplace...

On the one hand, there are several reasons why the quality of work is irrelevant to how people dress in many work contexts...

On the other hand, it is understandable that dress codes still exist for some good reasons in certain professions...

In conclusion, while the quality of work is more important than how employees dress, I believe dress codes influence some professions...
Band: 6
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Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words23212754%
Top 300 Words104 (44%)42 (33%)40%
300 - 1000 Words55 (23%)39 (30%)70%
Over 1000 Words73 (31%)46 (36%)63%
Other Comments (ziyuenshu)
Link Words: 13 (including link phrase: 1)
Sentences: Number: 12; Average Length: 124 characters; Words/Sentence: 19
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-The essay is less than 250, doesn't match the basic criteria.
-The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has dress(8), and(7), work(6), employees(6), codes(4), people(3), quality(3); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
Task Response:
-The main ideas are relevant, but some are insufficiently developed.
Coherence and Cohesion:
-The response has a clear overall progression but is somewhat mechanical.
- Help Link
Lexical Resources:
-Lexis is mainly appropriate for the task, though there are some errors in word choice.