Good education is more important for academic success than individual ability. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers Let me try my essay.
 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #7079
Question:
Good education is more important for academic success than individual ability. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Answer Hints:
You need to give your view and supporting points. Either side is ok, but "individual ability" is easy to write.

Good education
  • Students get knowledge.
  • Students get skills.
  • Build students' personalities, such as hard work, teamwork
Individual ability
  • High efficiency in learning new things
  • Smart and flexible in solving puzzles
  • Hardworking in challenges
  • Keep curiosity about unknown things
Answer 1
For some people, a student's academic success is determined by their teachers' teaching skills and dedication; others insist that a student's individual ability is the primary factor that decides whether he or she will be successful. I believe that a student's ability is primary though good education is the base for ...
By Paluo Han, 2022-08-02  View full answer - Revised by tutor
Total words: 341
Band: 7
The below version has fixed some obvious lexical and grammatical defects. The band is by the revised version, but comments are based on the original version.
Task Response:
-All parts of the prompt are addressed, and a clear position is presented throughout the response. But should notice teacher isn't equal to education.
Coherence and Cohesion:
-A range of cohesive devices is used flexibly, while each paragraph has a clear central topic that is developed.
Lexical Resources:
-Lexis is mainly appropriate for the task, though there are some errors in word choice.
Grammar Range and Accuracy:
-There is a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, and although errors occur, they rarely reduce communication.