Some people think the Olympic Games are exciting and can bring nations together. Others, however, think that it is a waste of money.

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 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #7082
Question:
Some people think the Olympic Games are exciting and can bring nations together. Others, however, think that it is a waste of money. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Answer Hints:
You need to discuss the views of the two sides before giving your position.

Bring nations together
  • A party per 4 years to draw eyeballs worldwide, especially of youth.
  • Sports are just a platform, its core is cultural communication.
  • Competition under the name of nation and country helps to understand various nations.
  • Bring chances for economic and cultural cooperation.
Waste money
  • Huge investment for various sports facilities, some would be useless after the event.
  • Sports events should make money, not reversely.
  • "Bring nation together" is a political view, isn't a part of sport. No game should pay for it.
  • Even if we want to promote "globalization", modern Olympic Games are too expensive for the host countries.
Answer 1
Some people think the Olympic Games are one of the most crucial bonds among various countries, though a considerable amount of money spent on this activity remains a heated controversy...

On the one hand, many taxpayers believe that the Olympic Games have been heavily invested in too much money...

On the other hand, some others, not only Olympic Games fans, contend that the Olympic Games are highly influential for the public to acquire more knowledge of sports and cultures worldwide, positively impacting citizens' lifestyles...

Admittedly, the Olympic Games might become nonsense or wasteful, provided they spend too much money on temporary constructions...
Band: 7.5
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Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words28015756%
Top 300 Words131 (46%)45 (28%)34%
300 - 1000 Words53 (18%)40 (25%)75%
Over 1000 Words96 (34%)72 (45%)75%
Other Comments (paluohan)
Link Words: 18 (including link phrase: 1)
Sentences: Number: 11; Average Length: 165 characters; Words/Sentence: 25
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
Task Response:
-All parts of the prompt are addressed, and a clear position is presented throughout the response.
Coherence and Cohesion:
-The writing is well organized and has a clear progression throughout, although using some cohesive devices could have been more flexible.
Lexical Resources:
-There is a good range of vocabulary, and there are some less common words and phrases
Grammar Range and Accuracy:
-Grammar and punctuation are well controlled. There are various complex structures with frequent error-free sentences and reasonable control over grammar and punctuation.