The values that we learn from our parents and family have a greater influence on our future success than the knowledge and skills we learn at school. Do you agree?

IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers Let me try to write.
 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #7150
Question:
The values that we learn from our parents and family have a greater influence on our future success than the knowledge and skills we learn at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Answer Hints:
This is an open question. You can choose to write either side. However, if you can balance your view with the other side a little, it should be a more persuasive essay.

Support parents and family
  • Parents teach children the importance of traits such as responsibility, honesty, and respect for others from a young age.
  • Parents who prioritize education often instill a sense of curiosity and the drive to seek knowledge.
  • Children learn social and emotional skills in the family setting more easily.
  • Children have more time with parents and family members.
Support school
  • School education lets children learn essential knowledge and skills that families cannot give.
  • Schools can offer more open and positive value views that not every family can do.
  • School education builds teamwork, communication, and many other skills.
Answer 1
Some argue that the values we learn from our parents and family have a more significant impact on our success in life, while others believe that the knowledge and skills acquired at school are more important...

Firstly, family values play a central role in shaping an individual's character, work ethic, and approach to life...

Moreover, family values can shape our attitudes toward education and personal growth. Parents who prioritize education and lifelong learning often instill a sense of curiosity and the drive to seek knowledge...

In addition, the social and emotional skills developed in the family setting are often more influential in shaping long-term success than the academic knowledge gained in school...

In conclusion, while formal education undoubtedly equips individuals with essential knowledge and skills, the values and life lessons instilled by our families play a more significant and lasting role in determining our future success...
Band: 7.5
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Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words39717443%
Top 300 Words186 (46%)51 (29%)27%
300 - 1000 Words71 (17%)34 (19%)47%
Over 1000 Words140 (35%)89 (51%)63%
Other Comments (jianguotran)
Link Words: 41 (including link phrase: 2)
Sentences: Number: 16; Average Length: 157 characters; Words/Sentence: 24
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-The essay is too long, try to shrink it.
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has and(23), our(10), more(8), that(7), values(7), family(7), are(7); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
-Suggest refining coherence and cohesion by removing wordy linking words.