In many countries, children are engaged in different kinds of paid work
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Question:
In many countries, children are engaged in different kinds of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it a valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. What is your opinion?
In many countries, children are engaged in different kinds of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it a valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. What is your opinion?
Answer 1
The issue of whether or not children should be engaged in some paid work has sparked a heated debate...
First of all, a workplace designed for adults is usually a shortage of child-friendly facilities. Desks and chairs are too high for a child; the light switches are installed on the walls and are unreachable by children; also, emergency training and facilities such as phones are only provided to adults...
Also, children would find it frustrating to be not correctly inducted before starting a job. A child working in a cement factory would feel a setback when he could not get immediate support while struggling with the procedures of recording different raw materials that are required by the job...
To conclude, a child's paid employment experience would negatively impact their health and active learning...
First of all, a workplace designed for adults is usually a shortage of child-friendly facilities. Desks and chairs are too high for a child; the light switches are installed on the walls and are unreachable by children; also, emergency training and facilities such as phones are only provided to adults...
Also, children would find it frustrating to be not correctly inducted before starting a job. A child working in a cement factory would feel a setback when he could not get immediate support while struggling with the procedures of recording different raw materials that are required by the job...
To conclude, a child's paid employment experience would negatively impact their health and active learning...
Band: 7
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Answer 2
Letting children work for some payment is an open question, in my opinion. Both education and job are essential for anyone, but when and how to get them are different stories...
On the one hand, every child must be educated first to be exposed to all types of subjects like mathematics, science, social science, etc...
On the other hand, having responsibilities for a child is always rudimentary if he comes from a poor background or poverty...
Finally, education is essential for every child to gain knowledge regarding various aspects and implement them in the desired field, though paid work adds experience at that young age...
On the one hand, every child must be educated first to be exposed to all types of subjects like mathematics, science, social science, etc...
On the other hand, having responsibilities for a child is always rudimentary if he comes from a poor background or poverty...
Finally, education is essential for every child to gain knowledge regarding various aspects and implement them in the desired field, though paid work adds experience at that young age...
Band: 6.5
Word Statistics
| Group | Word Number | Distinct | Percent |
|---|---|---|---|
| All Words | 271 | 146 | 53% |
| Top 300 Words | 156 (57%) | 61 (41%) | 39% |
| 300 - 1000 Words | 50 (18%) | 34 (23%) | 68% |
| Over 1000 Words | 65 (23%) | 51 (34%) | 78% |
Other Comments (kalyanchakravarthy)
Link Words: 16 (including link phrase: 1)
Sentences: Number: 13; Average Length: 122 characters; Words/Sentence: 20
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has and(9), child(7), for(6), work(5), some(4), paid(4), experience(4); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
IELTS Essay Format:
-The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has and(9), child(7), for(6), work(5), some(4), paid(4), experience(4); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
Answer 3
Nowadays, young children started working and earning money in many parts of the world. But some claim it is totally wrong, whereas another group proposes that this work experience is precious for children to get work experience and become responsible...
To begin with, many people think that childhood is to play, study, and enjoy but not to work and earn money as they cannot handle the burden of work and stress...
On the other hand, many countries where high school or college students work part-time to earn money for extra expenses...
To sum up, both groups have their reasons to support their arguments. But, in my opinion, as long as the child is willing to work and should allow them, the government should also ensure that no one is forcefully abiding them to work...
To begin with, many people think that childhood is to play, study, and enjoy but not to work and earn money as they cannot handle the burden of work and stress...
On the other hand, many countries where high school or college students work part-time to earn money for extra expenses...
To sum up, both groups have their reasons to support their arguments. But, in my opinion, as long as the child is willing to work and should allow them, the government should also ensure that no one is forcefully abiding them to work...
Band: 5
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