Nowadays many young people spend their free time in shopping centers

IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers Let me try to write.
 IELTS General Essay Answers - #4045
Question:
Nowadays many young people spend their free time in shopping centers. This has a negative effect on youths and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Answer 1
Young people spend much of their leisure time in shopping centers today. It is feared that this trend can negatively influence the youth and society...

On the individual level, allocating excessive amounts of lime to make purchases at shopping malls can cause the young generation to waste a lot of money...

On the societal level, the communities can suffer from a decrease in intellectual and work productivity as young people are more interested in leisure pursuits rather than focusing on their work or study...

In conclusion, I believe that this trend has an overall negative impact on both the young and the society as a whole...
Band: 6.5
View full answer
View comments
......
Answer 2
Now, many young people spend long hours in malls and shopping centers. Although it seems like a waste of time, this phenomenon has significant boons in its favor...

On the one hand, it is undeniable that shopping centers may not be the best place for young people to spend their leisure time...

However, despite those disadvantages, there are also some positive points on the bright side. One of the most magnificent advantages of being in such environments is getting in contact with a wide range of diverse personalities, which enhances an individual's social skills and self-confidence...

Besides the mentioned boons, juveniles spending their free time at shopping malls would allow them to get in touch with state-of-the-art technology...

In conclusion, while accepting the drawbacks of the increase in shopping centers explored by juveniles, it appears that the advantages of this emerging habit outweigh its disadvantages...
Band: 6
View full answer
View comments
Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words24014861%
Top 300 Words122 (50%)50 (33%)40%
300 - 1000 Words46 (19%)35 (23%)76%
Over 1000 Words72 (30%)63 (42%)87%
Other Comments (hethehereal)
Link Words: 16 (including link phrase: 0)
Sentences: Number: 12; Average Length: 125 characters; Words/Sentence: 20
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-The essay is less than 250, doesn't match the basic criteria.
-The introduction isn't strong enough, try to enhance it.
-The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.