IELTS General Essay Answers

Test materials of writing task 2: Some people think that teenagers should be requested an unpaid job in their free time. They believe that these will be helpful for both individual teenagers and local communities. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons to your answer, and require examples.

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 IELTS General Essay Answers - #4200611
Question:
Some people think that teenagers should be requested an unpaid job in their free time. They believe that these will be helpful for both individual teenagers and local communities. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons to your answer, and require examples.
Answer 1
I agree that having a job is a rewarding way for teenagers to spend their free time and also a great way to strengthen local communities. However, I believe it would be more advantageous for both teenagers and communities if the job comes with a salary.
First and foremost, teenagers need motivation more than ...
By hm, 2020-06-17  View full answer - Revised by tutor
Total words: 288
Band: 7
The below version has fixed some obvious lexical and grammatical defects. The band is by the revised version, but comments are based on the original version.
Excellent essay, if having examples, it should get a higher score.
Answer 2
Volunteer jobs are bringing more opportunities for youngsters' personal and professional life. Some people assert that teenager should be spent their valuable time in unpaid job for the welfare of society. I agree with this statement. It will be vital not only for the youngster's future but also for the unpaid ...
By jarry , 2020-09-26  View full answer - Revised by tutor
Total words: 392
Band: 6
The below version has fixed some obvious lexical and grammatical defects. The band is by the revised version, but comments are based on the original version.
Task Response:
-The main ideas are extended and supported; the response is ok, but they aren't supported with clear examples per the question,
Coherence and Cohesion:
-The organization is evident; however, the answer lacks contextualization, and cohesion within sentences is sometimes faulty.
- Help Link
Lexical Resources:
-The essay didn't use less common vocabulary with accuracy.
- Help Link
Grammar Range and Accuracy:
-A few grammatical errors, such as article (a, an, the).
- Help Link1, Help Link2