IELTS Academic Essay Answers

Test materials of writing task 2: People buy a product if it fulfill their needs; there is no need for advertisement. To what extent do you agree or disagree with it?

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 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #2200320
TOPIC: People buy a product if it fulfill their needs; there is no need for advertisement. To what extent do you agree or disagree with it?
Answer 1
The promotion has been considered redundant because residents purchase goods to satisfy their demands. While I accept that needs are the primary drive for consumption, I believe that advertisement, which plays certain roles, should not be eradicated.
On the one hand, it is understandable when demands lay the ...
By Minh Hup, 2020-05-10  View full answer - Revised by tutor
Total words: 294
AI Comment:
  • The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
  • Obvious Grammar Errors: 2.
Tutor Comment:
Band 7
Excellent essay. The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to enhance your points.
Answer 2
Advertisements have long been marketing tools in human society for some time. While, to some extent, advertising encourages people to buy production, others believe that ads will be useless if goods simply reach consumers' needs. I firmly believe that the former viewpoint can be justified and will further examine both ...
By chouray, 2020-04-07  View full answer - Revised by tutor
Total words: 271
AI Comment:
  • High ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing, suggest to rephrase some of them. You can try to rewrite Introduction as start point.
  • Obvious Grammar Errors: 5.
Tutor Comment:
Band 6
Nice essay, the reasoning is good, but a little wordy. Suggest enhancing the conclusion.
Answer 3
It is irrefutable that individuals are living in the informative era, while they can easily get details of the latest product through ad. Some people believe that if people have to need any product, they can easily buy it, and ads are not necessary for them, whereas others condemn this statement. Although I disagree ...
By jarry, 2020-04-09  View full answer - Revised by tutor
Total words: 455
AI Comment:
  • The essay is too long, suggest to shrink it.
  • You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has PEOPLE(14) AND(14) THAT(10); try to decrease duplicated words.
  • High ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing, suggest to rephrase some of them. You can try to rewrite Paragraph 3 as start point.
  • Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level. E.g., Introduction seems too plain, try to polish it.
  • Obvious Grammar Errors: 0.
Tutor Comment:
Band 5.5
Reasoning and structure are good, but the original version has many syntax defeats, so that essay seems wordy and not very persuasive although the view is clear.