TOPIC: Earlier, people wore clothes which were related to their culture. But now, people wear same type of clothes all over the world. Is this a positive development or negative development?
It is irrefutable that clothes were represented people culture and religion during the bygone days; however, nowadays, people like to wear a similar dress around the globe. Some people believe that wearing the same types of clothes are more advantageous for people as compare to ethnic wear. I will elaborate on both ...
Total words: 418
- The essay is too long, suggest to shrink it.
- The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
- You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has AND(19) CLOTHES(12) WEAR(10); try to decrease duplicated words.
- High ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing, suggest to rephrase some of them. You can try to rewrite Paragraph 3 as start point.
- Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level. E.g., Introduction seems too plain, try to polish it.
- Suggest refining coherence and cohesion by removing wordy linking words.
- Obvious Grammar Errors: 9>.
Grammar and vocabulary are quite good, the reasoning has room to refine. You should give own point in the introduction, support it in the essay, and emphasize at conclusion.