Giving pocket money to children is very common in many countries. To what extend do you agree and disagree?
Pocket money is claimed to be not only quite common for modern children but also extremely useful. However, not every person agree with this statement, and some believe they could misuse pocket money on harmful things like drug or alcohol. In my perspective, it could lead to both negative and positive aspects, but a ...
Total words: 322
Band: 6The below version has fixed some obvious lexical and grammatical defects. The band is by the revised version, but comments are based on the original version.
The structure and logic are good. But the original version has too many grammar and vocabulary errors, which cannot touch to Band 5.
Giving pocket money to children has become a common trend in many countries. Some people believe that it might hurt teenagers, but I think it will bring numerous youngster life changes to manage finance at an early age. I agree with this statement and discuss both sides in the upcoming paragraphs.
Total words: 387
Band: 6The below version has fixed some obvious lexical and grammatical defects. The band is by the revised version, but comments are based on the original version.Task Response:
-All parts of the prompt are addressed, and a position is presented.Coherence and Cohesion:
-The organization is evident and cohesive devices are used, though rather mechanically, like "as a result"
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-Some sentences are wordy or too long to understand.Lexical Resources:
-Lexis is mainly appropriate for the task, though there are some errors in word choice and spelling.Grammar Range and Accuracy:
-Some grammatical errors, such as nouns (singular, plural).
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