Some people think job satisfaction is more important than job security, while others think it is important to find a permanent job

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 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #6063
Question:
Some people think job satisfaction is more important than job security, while others think it is important to find a permanent job. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Answer 1
People are divided into views on whether job satisfaction and security are more critical for people...

Undoubtedly, umpteen brighter side brings job contentment to people and his family. The prominent factor is that it provides peace of mind to an individual...

On the other hand, some believe that job security is a vital part of everyone's life. These days, most people advocate a permanent job to curb the tension of people; if a person knows that he can quickly obtain a salary in the account, he is free from anxiety and worries...

In my ideology, both play a mandatory role in individual life; however, job contentment is more essential for folks...

To conclude, there is no doubt job satisfaction has more positive points than job security. If people have enough knowledge and skills about their work, they cannot depend upon others for earning...
Band: 6.5
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Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words45121146%
Top 300 Words216 (47%)62 (29%)28%
300 - 1000 Words100 (22%)42 (19%)42%
Over 1000 Words135 (29%)107 (50%)79%
Other Comments (jarry)
Link Words: 23 (including link phrase: 1)
Sentences: Number: 24; Average Length: 113 characters; Words/Sentence: 18
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-The essay is too long, try to shrink it.
-The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has and(17), job(15), people(13), their(11), are(7), for(7), that(7); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
Answer 2
Contentedness in line of work is a key feature for some, whilst another group considers occupation stability significant...

On the one hand, there is employee satisfaction with facets like the nature of work and career growth opportunities, including promotion, pay, supervision, colleagues, and a work-life balance...

Furthermore, from an individual's perspective, it results in overall wellness. A challenging task requiring risk-taking, flexible hours, functional autonomy, appreciation, supportive work environment, and salary increments all add to intrinsic satisfaction, consequently having a constructive ripple effect on life outside the workplace...

On the other hand, permanence does wonders for the mental psyche. Anyone with a stable job has a sense of belonging along with security...

After studying both advantages, I can conclusively say that job permanence is a subset of job satisfaction, the latter being all-embracing and much-needed...
Band: 6.5
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