Some different medical traditions are now widely known and used: Western medicine, herbal medicine, acupuncture, homeopathy, etc

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 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #2014
Question:
Some different medical traditions are now widely known and used: Western medicine, herbal medicine, acupuncture, homeopathy, etc. How important is the patient's mental attitude towards his/her treatment in determining the effectiveness of the treatment?
Answer 1
A wide range of medical treatments is available today. Patients may wonder which will be the most effective and whether their mental attitude to the type of treatment might affect its success...

Many people visit their doctor or go to the hospital with complete trust in the expert care offered by conventional services...

Similarly, those patients who choose alternative treatments over traditional medicine may be disillusioned...

On the other hand, patients may try a treatment style with some skepticism. A person used to conventional medicines and drugs may be suspicious of treatments based on diet and lifestyle changes...

In conclusion, it appears that the patient's mental attitude is not the most significant factor in determining the treatment outcome...
Band: 7
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Answer 2
The choice of treatment method for anyone facing a medical problem usually depends on their beliefs and faiths...

First of all, patients should shed the fear of death or negative thoughts. A positive thought will always bolster wonder in a patient's life and recovery from the disease...

Secondly, when a person who is ill is anxious, additional complications can be seen in such a person, and this will likely exacerbate the existing pitiable condition...

Another point I would like to make is that different people react differently to a medicine. A drug, a medical treatment, and related medical procedures work smoothly only when other health parameters are stable...
Band: 5.5
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Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words25114156%
Top 300 Words118 (47%)41 (29%)34%
300 - 1000 Words45 (17%)36 (25%)80%
Over 1000 Words88 (35%)64 (45%)72%
Other Comments (rajatsharma)
Link Words: 21 (including link phrase: 0)
Sentences: Number: 13; Average Length: 117 characters; Words/Sentence: 19
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-The conclusion is wordy, try to simplify it.
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-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
-Suggest refining coherence and cohesion by removing wordy linking words.