More people from different cities are spending more time away from their families. What are the possible reasons and the effects on themselves and their families?
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Question:
Nowadays, more and more people from different cities spend more time away from their families. What are the possible reasons and the effects on the people and their families?
Nowadays, more and more people from different cities spend more time away from their families. What are the possible reasons and the effects on the people and their families?
Answer Hints:
Mixed topics. Two questions: reason and effect
Mixed topics. Two questions: reason and effect
The first question: Reason
Leaving home and spending less time with family- Pursuing career success
- Long working hours
- A larger circle of friends than before
- Social life is richer than before
The first question: Impact
- Spend less time with family members (negative)
- Lack of communication and bonding among family (negative)
- Enjoy more personal freedom (positive)
- Life satisfaction may increase (positive)
Answer 1
Since time immemorial, the pattern of living and living style has been changing. In this day and age, many people are staying in different big cities away from their families...
One of the cogent reasons for living away from parents and other members is to pursue tertiary education...
This tendency has many detrimental repercussions on a person's life and family. For a start, individuals have to struggle alone in another city; they cannot share their feelings, emotions, or issues with their loved ones, leading them to face mental stress and depression...
In conclusion, since more people now want to achieve higher education and earn money, they must stay away from their families, which is unsuitable for them and their families...
One of the cogent reasons for living away from parents and other members is to pursue tertiary education...
This tendency has many detrimental repercussions on a person's life and family. For a start, individuals have to struggle alone in another city; they cannot share their feelings, emotions, or issues with their loved ones, leading them to face mental stress and depression...
In conclusion, since more people now want to achieve higher education and earn money, they must stay away from their families, which is unsuitable for them and their families...
Band: 7.5
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Answer 2
Indeed, a significant number of people nowadays are living and working far from their homes. There could be various reasons for this reality, and I will discuss its effects on people and their families in the following paragraphs...
To begin with, that people spend more time away from their families may result from some reasons. Firstly, students in rural areas move to cities to study at universities, and then they choose to stay there to work after graduating...
This trend could positively and negatively affect people and their families. Workers moving to big cities will have a wide variety of jobs and, therefore, can earn much more money to support their families...
In conclusion, people spend more time far from their families due to their work and study. This reality could be both beneficial and detrimental to themselves and their families at the same time...
To begin with, that people spend more time away from their families may result from some reasons. Firstly, students in rural areas move to cities to study at universities, and then they choose to stay there to work after graduating...
This trend could positively and negatively affect people and their families. Workers moving to big cities will have a wide variety of jobs and, therefore, can earn much more money to support their families...
In conclusion, people spend more time far from their families due to their work and study. This reality could be both beneficial and detrimental to themselves and their families at the same time...
Band: 6.5
Word Statistics
| Group | Word Number | Distinct | Percent |
|---|---|---|---|
| All Words | 276 | 145 | 52% |
| Top 300 Words | 153 (55%) | 55 (37%) | 35% |
| 300 - 1000 Words | 57 (20%) | 39 (26%) | 68% |
| Over 1000 Words | 66 (23%) | 51 (35%) | 77% |
Other Comments (coastgates)
Link Words: 26 (including link phrase: 4)
Sentences: Number: 16; Average Length: 102 characters; Words/Sentence: 17
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has and(13), their(12), families(7), people(6), from(6), have(5), could(4); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
Task Response:IELTS Essay Format:
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has and(13), their(12), families(7), people(6), from(6), have(5), could(4); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
-Main ideas are relevant, but some would benefit from further development.
Coherence and Cohesion:
-Ideas are generally arranged coherently, and there is a clear overall progression.
Lexical Resources:
-Lexis is mainly appropriate for the task, though the essay didn't use less common vocabulary with accuracy.
Grammar Range and Accuracy:
-There is a good range of complex structures, and many sentences have accurate grammar and punctuation.