The government should spend money on children taking part in sports and art activities in schools, rather than sponsoring professional events for the public.
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Question:
The government should spend money on children taking part in sports and art activities in schools, rather than sponsoring professional sports and art events for the public. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The government should spend money on children taking part in sports and art activities in schools, rather than sponsoring professional sports and art events for the public. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Answer Hints:
1 Introduction:
1 Introduction:
- Paraphrase the question: Some argue that governments should fund school-level sports and art activities for children instead of sponsoring professional events.
- Thesis: I agree because supporting young people yields long-term benefits for both individuals and society, although limited funding for professional events may still be beneficial.
- Point: Early exposure to sports and arts improves health, creativity, and social skills.
- Example: Team sports foster teamwork and discipline; art clubs enhance imagination and confidence.
- Link: Investing in children creates lifelong advantages and reduces future health/social problems.
- Point: Professional events bring short-term entertainment but consume huge budgets.
- Example: Hosting global sports tournaments is costly and benefits mainly athletes and organizers.
- Link: School funding is more equitable and sustainable.
- Acknowledge: Some funding for professional events is valuable (tourism, inspiration, national pride).
- Balance: However, this should be secondary, with the majority of investments being made in schools.
- Restate thesis: While professional events have merits, prioritizing children’s participation in sports and arts is wiser.
- His strategy fosters healthier, more creative future generations.
Answer 1
It is often argued that government funding should prioritize school-level sports and art activities for children instead of financing professional events for the general public...
First of all, directing public money to children’s participation in sports and art creates a strong foundation for their physical, mental, and social development...
In contrast, sponsoring large-scale professional sports and art events often provides only short-term entertainment rather than long-lasting value...
Nevertheless, it should be acknowledged that some investment in professional events is beneficial...
In conclusion, although professional events have some advantages, government expenditure on children’s participation in sports and art at schools is a more effective and fair approach...
First of all, directing public money to children’s participation in sports and art creates a strong foundation for their physical, mental, and social development...
In contrast, sponsoring large-scale professional sports and art events often provides only short-term entertainment rather than long-lasting value...
Nevertheless, it should be acknowledged that some investment in professional events is beneficial...
In conclusion, although professional events have some advantages, government expenditure on children’s participation in sports and art at schools is a more effective and fair approach...
Band: 9
Word Statistics
| Group | Word Number | Distinct | Percent |
|---|---|---|---|
| All Words | 330 | 183 | 55% |
| Top 300 Words | 129 (39%) | 45 (24%) | 34% |
| 300 - 1000 Words | 55 (16%) | 34 (18%) | 61% |
| Over 1000 Words | 146 (44%) | 104 (56%) | 71% |
Other Comments (samfrank)
Link Words: 36 (including link phrase: 0)
Sentences: Number: 15; Average Length: 153 characters; Words/Sentence: 22
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
-Suggest refining coherence and cohesion by removing wordy linking words.
IELTS Essay Format:
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
-Suggest refining coherence and cohesion by removing wordy linking words.