Should parents be obliged to immunize their children against common childhood diseases

IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers Let me try to write.
 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #2026
Should parents be obliged to immunize their children against common childhood diseases? Or do individuals have the right to choose not to immunize their children? What is your view of this practice?
Answer 1
Some people argue that the state does not have the right to make parents immunize their children. However, I feel the question is not whether they should be vaccinated but whether, as members of society, they have the right not to...

Preventative medicine has proved to be the most effective way of reducing the incidence of fatal childhood diseases...

In previous centuries, children died from ordinary illnesses such as influenza and tuberculosis, and because few people had immunity, the diseases spread quickly...

Serious diseases such as polio and smallpox have also been eradicated through national immunization programs...

Immunization is not an issue like seatbelts, which affects only the individual. A decision not to immunize will have widespread repercussions for the whole of society, and for this reason, I do not believe that individuals have the right to stand aside...
Band: 7
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Answer 2
It's a complicated problem. In general and in actuality, parents make decisions about immunizing or not immunizing children from deadly diseases; they have to take responsibility for the children's health...

We all know that children who are less than 6 or 7 age are vulnerable to diseases and should have fatal results or problems in their forthcoming future lives if they are not protected from heinous diseases...

Children who suffer from deadly diseases and get affected by them in the future start hating their parents...

To sum up, parents must be responsible for their children, and they mustn't choose to immunize or not immunize; that should be a must for parents...
Band: 6.5
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Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words33214744%
Top 300 Words207 (62%)67 (45%)32%
300 - 1000 Words41 (12%)29 (19%)70%
Over 1000 Words84 (25%)51 (34%)60%
Other Comments (eldarrehimli)
Link Words: 20 (including link phrase: 1)
Sentences: Number: 19; Average Length: 102 characters; Words/Sentence: 17
IELTS Essay Format:
-The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has children(14), and(10), parents(9), for(9), must(9), not(8), their(7); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.