Many families need both parents to go out to work

IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers Let me try to write.
 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #2031
Question:
Many families need both parents to go out to work. While some say the children benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parents' absence. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Answer 1
In the past, a typical family consisted of a father who went out to work and a mother who stayed home and looked after the children...

Some people think that the children of working parents are in an advantageous position where their parents can afford more luxuries such as new clothes, video games, or mobile phones...

On the other hand, however, some claim that when both parents work, their children do not get enough support and attention, meaning that these children might not do as well at school because there is no one at home to provide support with such things as homework or exam revision...

When I was growing up, both my parents worked, and I was always well provided for. On the other hand, I think that it would sometimes have been better if I could have seen more of my parents...

In conclusion, we cannot change the fact that both parents have to work nowadays; it is not ideal, but if parents make time for their children in the evenings and at the weekends, then the children will not suffer in any way...
Band: 7
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Answer 2
Parenting today is different than it was a couple of decades ago. Unlike before, mostly both father and mother have jobs...

When both spouses earn, household finances run smoothly, and they can raise their children the best way they want...

On the contrary, when both parents are working, there could also be a negative effect. One of the main disadvantages is that they can't give their children time because they have to divide time between their professional and personal lives...

In conclusion, both parents working can prove helpful in giving their children the best of everything...
Band: 7
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Answer 3
The modern world is changing families' structure and shape. Many mothers have to work to address financial issues...

Some people argue that working for both parents is not good for children for some important reasons...

However, opponents are of the opinion that both parents can work outside without any problem at home...

To conclude, though some people believe the working of both parents is not helpful for children, others don't believe in it...
Band: 6.5
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Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words27313549%
Top 300 Words151 (55%)50 (37%)33%
300 - 1000 Words52 (19%)35 (25%)67%
Over 1000 Words70 (25%)50 (37%)71%
Other Comments (alihosseini)
Link Words: 13 (including link phrase: 0)
Sentences: Number: 21; Average Length: 81 characters; Words/Sentence: 13
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has parents(12), children(9), can(8), their(8), for(7), and(6), both(6); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.