Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists, not local people

IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers Let me try to write.
 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #7030
Question:
Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists, not local people. Why is this the case? What can be done to attract local people?
Answer 1
Historical monuments communicate the life of the last decades, which domestic or international tourists explore more than local people...

As I mentioned above, a lack of knowledge is why local people hesitate to visit places of historical relevance...

To solve this, I suggest we create awareness among people about the importance of museums and archaeological properties located nearby...

Finally, I also recommend that the authorities ensure a subsidized ticketing system for the residents and create some recreational facilities in the museum compound...
Band: 6.5
View full answer
View comments
......
Answer 2
Many museums and historical places are chiefly visited by tourists other than native people. This essay intends to explain the reason for this and the strategies to lure natives to such locations...

Historical places and artifacts conservation should be given reasonable relevance as they are taking care of a golden past...

Several actions can be imposed by authorities to enhance public knowledge. In addition, activities can be conducted to encourage people to visit such places...

To recapitulate, archaeological monuments and museums should be given equal fame within and outside their locality...
Band: 6
View full answer
View comments
Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words25413854%
Top 300 Words101 (39%)36 (26%)35%
300 - 1000 Words59 (23%)36 (26%)61%
Over 1000 Words94 (37%)66 (47%)70%
Other Comments (abha)
Link Words: 19 (including link phrase: 2)
Sentences: Number: 15; Average Length: 108 characters; Words/Sentence: 16
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has and(10), places(5), natives(5), for(5), historical(4), people(4), this(4); try to decrease duplicated words.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
Task Response:
-The main ideas are extended and supported; the response is ok, but the reason part isn't sufficient. The essay's logic has room to improve.
Coherence and Cohesion:
-The organization is evident, with some simple, cohesive devices, but sometimes used inaccurately.
Lexical Resources:
-Lexis is mainly appropriate for the task, though there are some errors in word choice.