Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the first punishment. Why is this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?

IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers Let me try to write.
 IELTS General Essay Answers - #4035
Question:
Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the first punishment. Why is this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?
Answer Hints:
You need to answer two questions: the reasons and the solutions. They are difficult questions for most IELTS writers to answer in a way with logic or political correctness. However, your reasons and the solutions should have connections.

Causes
  • The first punishment is too light; offenders aren't afraid law.
  • Prison doesn't correctly educate prisoners. Instead, prisoners share crime experiences with each other.
  • After the prisoner is back in society, it is difficult to be accepted.
  • The root cause of the first crime still exists.
  • The circumstance is even worse than before first entering prison.
Solutions
  • The law should punish those who break it with higher efficiency.
  • Prison shouldn't be a place to exchange crime experiences and skills.
  • Prison should help prisoners prepare back to normal life before out.
  • Communities need special channels to help ex-convicts reenter.
Answer 1
Some cases show that ex-convicts commit crimes again after they leave prison. The reasons may be various and complicated, but by looking into them, we can find out a few measures which can be taken to solve this problem...

Firstly, in prison, many man with a criminal record is put together in the same building for a very long time; this system creates a favorable environment for degenerate minds to exchange ideas and information, inevitably causing them to behave even worse...

To help ex-prisoners reform and rejoin the community, prisons should focus on rehabilitation and community services as a means to change the criminals, not only by imprisonment itself...

In conclusion, the current prison system should focus more on rehabilitation, community acceptance, and educational programs for prisoners instead of punishing them...
Band: 7
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Answer 2
Some criminals indeed commit crimes again after they have been punished. While there are several reasons for this alarming trend, some effective measures can be taken by governments to tackle this problem...

There are two main reasons for re-offenders. Firstly, the prison system can make the situation worse...

To solve this problem, governments should focus on rehabilitation of criminals rather than punishment...

In conclusion, the re-offenders indeed are one of the problems in our community; it can be solved by focusing on rehabilitation rather than punishment itself...
Band: 6.5
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Answer 3
Even after being released from prison, a few people continue to do unlawful acts. Poverty is seen as the main reason for this, and job opportunities could help alleviate this problem...

Most prisoners come from the lower class of society. According to an article from Time Magazine, researchers show that the crime rate is rampant and highly high in third-world countries where there is hunger and a lack of job opportunities...

Increased work opportunities can help reduce crimes. If people have jobs, they can provide for their kin...

In summary, a previous convict included in the poor sector of society will most likely commit crimes again if they are jobless and unable to provide for themselves and their families...
Band: 6
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Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words26814955%
Top 300 Words135 (50%)50 (33%)37%
300 - 1000 Words41 (15%)27 (18%)65%
Over 1000 Words92 (34%)72 (48%)78%
Other Comments (andy)
Link Words: 17 (including link phrase: 0)
Sentences: Number: 14; Average Length: 114 characters; Words/Sentence: 19
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
Task Response:
-The prompt is not fully addressed; there is an attempt to discuss the cause, but ideas are limited. Its reasoning should be enhanced.
Coherence and Cohesion:
-The organization is logical, and each paragraph has a precise central topic.
Lexical Resources:
-The range of vocabulary is sufficient to allow some flexibility and precision, showing an awareness of styles and collocation.
Grammar Range and Accuracy:
-There is a mix of simple and complex sentence forms.
Answer 4
People believe that the majority of offenders restart crime even if they have to spend time in prison...

Undoubtedly, the predominant cause behind this issue is attaching the criminal tag. Often, we see that illegal people want to restart their lives as ordinary people; however, society still sees them as guilty and not accepted as community members...

Secondly, culprits believe this is a straightforward and fast way to earn money because they do not want to live a life as a layman...

There are numerous ways to mitigate this attitude. First and foremost, the government and the delinquent's mutual effort to alleviate this situation...

To conclude, most of the time, there are specific reasons for ex-criminals to commit crimes again...
Band: 6
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Answer 5
In contemporary society, many lawbreakers violate rules and laws more than once. Understanding why this phenomenon happens and how to reverse this trend is essential...

There are a few reasons for this problem. First, many criminals cannot receive enough education to obtain the necessary skills in imprisonment...

I believe the following methods can be considered to mitigate this problem...

Those who master the laws of authority should create prison rehabilitation programs to educate some trivial and habitual offenders, giving them opportunities to obtain the necessary skills...
Band: 5.5
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Answer 6
The number of people arrested is steadily growing, and more than half of them already have a criminal record...

The root of this problem is the incorrect jail system. The Jail system does not teach or reeducate the prisoners; the main target of prisoners is to survive until the end of the term...

The best way to solve that problem is to reconstruct the jail system. The government should let a prisoner communicate with the outside world...

Considering everything, crime is one of the essential problems in modern society. An incorrect jail system and weak fines triggered the crime more than once...
Band: 5
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