Some people believe that individuals over 65 should not be allowed to continue working. Others think that people should be allowed to work for as long as they choose. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Compulsory retirement age is a widely implemented policy in many countries, according to which senior workers are statutorily obliged to resign from their posts and start receiving their pension. While some people support this policy, many others believe that the elderly should have the right to dedicate themselves to ...
Total words: 322
Band: 8The below version has fixed some obvious lexical and grammatical defects. The band is by the revised version, but comments are based on the original version.Task Response:
-This is a well-organized essay, presenting ideas on both sides, developing these ideas effectively throughout the response.Coherence and Cohesion:
-Ideas are presented, extended, and supported, arranged coherently, and there is a clear overall progression.Lexical Resources:
-There is a good range of vocabulary, and there are some less common words and phrasesGrammar Range and Accuracy:
-There is a variety of complex structures with frequent error-free sentences and good control over grammar and punctuation.
Many nowadays think that government should not allow seniors after 65 to perform their work duties, while others claim that people should have rights as long as they wish. This essay will consider both perspectives but will support the first opinion, as working seniors could be a burden for young employees. Their work ...
Total words: 373
Band: 7The below version has fixed some obvious lexical and grammatical defects. The band is by the revised version, but comments are based on the original version.Task Response:
-All parts of the prompt are addressed, and a position is presented that is directly relevant to the prompt, but the example "senior employees pay less attention" isn't good to support your view.Coherence and Cohesion:
-Each paragraph has a clear central topic, which is developed, and there is an effective use of cohesive devices.Lexical Resources:
-The range of vocabulary is sufficient to allow some flexibility and precision, and it shows an awareness of styles and collocation. But sentences are wordy.Grammar Range and Accuracy:
-There is a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, with a fair degree of accuracy.