Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions, like nurses, doctors, and teachers.

IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers Let me try my essay.
 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #2006
Question:
Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions, like nurses, doctors, and teachers. Some people think it is fully justified, while others believe it is unfair. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Answer Hints:
This is a basic fact that society already accepts. So choosing it's fair is easy to write.

Support
  • Sports professionals are special talent, not a generic job.
  • They need hard and long-term training.
  • They take more challenge, risk, and sacrifice than many other careers.
  • They usually retire early, even in 20 or 30.
  • They create huge benefits for their bosses and society.
  • Some of them are models to encourage youth to grow up.
Oppose
  • A few sports professionals' rewards are much beyond their contribution.
  • Some occupations, especially not marketize ones, exists a big gap in comparison, e.g NBA stars and high school PE teachers.
Answer 1
Nobody can deny that certain professionals like nurses, doctors, and teachers are essential to the fabric of society and should therefore be rewarded accordingly. However, this is seldom the case. When we look at the salaries and fees commanded by certain film stars and actresses and people who run large companies, ...
By Greensea Red, 2021-11-30  View full answer - Revised by tutor
Total words: 260
Band: 6
The below version has fixed some obvious lexical and grammatical defects. The band is by the revised version, but comments are based on the original version.
Task Response:
-You need to put forward more reasons for why you agree with the statement. Your view wasn't supported strongly, the reverse view may be easy to develop.
Coherence and Cohesion:
-Ideas are generally arranged coherently, and there is a clear overall progression.
Lexical Resources:
-Lexis is mainly appropriate for the task, though there are some errors in word choice and spelling.
Grammar Range and Accuracy:
-There is a wide range of structures, these are used flexibly; however, there are occasional errors.
Answer 2
Payments in separate fields are very different. It's a common debate among people, especially in ages of ours. I think jobs in educational and health sectors deserve good...
By Rox Analuca , 2018-02-22  View full answer
Total words: 239
Band: NA
  • The essay is less than 250, doesn't match the basic criteria.
  • High ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing, suggest to rephrase some of them. You can try to rewrite Conclusion as start point.
  • Suggest to use a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level. E.g., Conclusion seems too plain, try to polish it.
  • Suggest to refine coherence and cohesion by removing wordy linking words.
Answer 3
People have separate views regarding to the huge earnings of successful sports professionals. While some people think these sports stars deserve high salary, I believe this is...
By Ciel Jessy , 2017-10-24  View full answer
Total words: 271
Band: NA
  • You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has SPORTS(8) PROFESSIONALS(8) OTHER(6); try to decrease duplicated words.
  • High ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing, suggest to rephrase some of them. You can try to rewrite Conclusion as start point.
  • Suggest to use a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level. E.g., Introduction seems too plain, try to polish it.
Answer 4
The world of sports is a multimillion dollar industry. Around the globe, people flock to sporting events or watch their favourite teams faithfully each week on television. As a...
By Hans Goredy, 2017-10-17  View full answer
Total words: 278
Band: NA
  • Paragraph 3 is relatively short, enrich it.
  • High ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing, suggest to rephrase some of them. You can try to rewrite Paragraph 1 as start point.
Answer 5
As a result of constant media attention, sports professionals in my country have become stars and celebrities, and those at the top are paid huge salaries. Just like movie stars...
By Jiabao Lam, 2017-10-17  View full answer
Total words: 249
Band: NA
  • The essay is less than 250, doesn't match the basic criteria.
  • High ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing, suggest to rephrase some of them. You can try to rewrite Paragraph 2 as start point.
  • Suggest to use a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level. E.g., Introduction seems too plain, try to polish it.
  • Suggest to refine coherence and cohesion by removing wordy linking words.