Some people think that it is more important to be informed of local/national news

IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers Let me try to write.
 IELTS General Essay Answers - #6848
Question:
Some people think that it is more important to be informed of local/national news. Other people think that it is more important to have international news. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Answer 1
People are divided into the views of whether national and local news is crucial for them, while the opposite advocates that international news is worthwhile for the individual...

Undoubtedly, there is an umpteen number of causes why folk argue that local news is more advantageous for demos...

By contrast, those people who argue that international news is more beneficial for demos. They ponder that with the help of the foreign press, people know about new technology and innovations of other nations and attain up-to-date information all over the globe...

In my ideology, both such as national and overseas news are playing a paramount role all over the world...

To conclude, these days, people belong to a global village where both national and international news are required...
Band: 6
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Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words36217748%
Top 300 Words188 (51%)60 (33%)31%
300 - 1000 Words63 (17%)40 (22%)63%
Over 1000 Words111 (30%)77 (43%)69%
Other Comments (jarry)
Link Words: 25 (including link phrase: 2)
Sentences: Number: 17; Average Length: 127 characters; Words/Sentence: 21
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-The essay is too long, try to shrink it.
-The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has and(16), news(11), people(9), for(9), are(6), that(6), both(5); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
Task Response:
-Coronavirus is a good example; it shouldn't mention social media here. The conclusion should be rewritten.